Monday, June 2, 2014 | By: BlackGargie

Money is the Root of All Evil

Heya guys!

I know I have been posting rather random stuff that I've seen while browsing the net, but that because I wanna still keep this blog alive and make sure that you guys know that I'm still alive. That, and also because nothing else out of the ordinary other than real life has happened so far.

Until recently.

From my previous entries, you know by now that the only family I've ever have left in this whole world that is closest to blood to me (other than my little princess) is my dad. After the nightmarish years of suffering my mother's wrath and finally escaping it thanks to my hubby, I have now rekindled my estranged relationship with my dad, and while it's not as close as it used to be, at least we were still now in contact and in talking terms.

He's not the best dad in the world, but to me, he's the lesser of two evils.

That said, he still has a bit of a problem when it comes to money-handling. At one point, he got himself into a really bad investment, and another when he got caught gambling online (which is apparently illegal in my hometown), so he had to handle a bunch of fines and monetary issues to get back on his feet. He had to resort to borrowing money from us, and while it left a bit of a sour note on my hubs, with the involvement of my dad in law, we gave whatever we can spare and helped him out a little.

He made good on his promise to pay us back by me setting up a bank account in my hometown and him wiring in money in increments, and that was OK.

Then recently he got in a bit of a fix because he kinda sorta broke his girlfriend's auto gear while driving her car, and while he wanted to claim responsibility for the damages, he bit more than he could chew and he called to beg for money again from us.

My hubs was not a happy camper. Maybe it was because he was burnt in the past for something he invested in, and that made him a little butt-fucked about giving my dad money again. He was afraid that it was a scam, or he got himself into illegal trouble again, and I can understand that. I told my hubs that I could foot the bill this time, since I was earning some money writing stories for an app I was involved in--I got an app called Episode and they recently opened their portal to allow users to send in and publish stories, and we get paid for it, which is awesome sauce, since I'm constantly broke all the time--but still, my hubs didn't like the idea of my dad's pan-handling.

We got into a little fight, that escalated when he threatened not to go back to my hometown and not letting my dad see my little princess. From there, I blew my gasket. He can say anything he wants about my dad, but when he threatens to use our own child as leverage, that was the last straw.

That I will not stand for. I grew up being my mom's leverage throughout my whole life and I've seen what she had done to many of her relationships and I will not allow anyone, not even myself or my hubs, to repeat that same mistake.

I literally screamed the house down, telling him that I am sick of being the middle man and sick of him being so goddamn angry at me for something that I didn't do. I screamed at him for using our princess as leverage, and I told him that I've already cut ties with my mom and there is no way I am going to cut ties with my dad just because of a bit of money issue. I have no one else anymore, I don't have any other family except my dad, so he has no right to split us apart like this. I am footing the bill this time, not him, so why was he being so butt-fucked about it?

I told him not to ever, EVER use our child as leverage, and if we are going back to our hometown, we are going back as a FAMILY because I REFUSE to be the middle man again and the one to have to why "Daddy isn't getting along with Grandpa". I told him to just pay him the goddamn money and STFU about it.

It was quite a big fight, a fight that we haven't had in quite a while. My hubs said that he is struggling to get by and save money so that we can leave the country, get our own home and our own comfortable life, but my dad's pan-handling was not making it easy.

I get it.

I totally get it.

I understand that our money is super tight and there is no way we can get by if we keep paying for other people's problems.

But he is my dad. Not the best dad in the world, I know he has flaws that I'm not too proud of, but he is the lesser of two evils. What does he expect me to do? Abandon him to rot and die? I would gladly do that to my mom, but not him.

He was the only person that understood me to a degree and made the effort to look after me, especially when I'm sick or injured, and all my mom does is just dump me to him whenever she deems necessary and fit for her schedule.

Was she there when I had a hole in my head? No.

Was she there when I had chickenpox? No.

Was she there when I was sick with the flu? Or any other sickness for that matter? No.

My dad was there. My dad looked after me and gave me herbal baths to reduce scarring from my chickenpox. My dad was there and brought me to the doctors when I punched a hole in my head. My dad was there feeding me medicinal herbs and fed me delicious food, anything that I wanted.

My dad is not a saint, but he did his best, and demanded nothing less than love from his daughter.

We kissed and made up later, and true to my word, I took out money from my account and sent it to my dad. The only thing I needed from my hubs is his WU card to send the money to him. That was all. I still got a little teary because I always feel bad after yelling at my hubs (or prolly anyone in particular), but at least we patched up and moved on, and my dad got his money he needed.


Money is truly the root of all evil.